It's not always that easy

Parenting 101: When a belligerent child takes a stance that you disagree with, hold your ground and don't give in. If you do give in, there is a good chance that the child will never learn the appropriate response. If you continue to act consistently, eventually it will get easier.

Up until now, this rule has worked for me. However, when I had Evan, the rule book got thrown out the window and run over by a car.

I have been discussing Evan's dislike of his winter coat, yet his clothing preferences don't stop there. Ev is vehemently opposed to any clothes resembling "nice." No khakis, no jeans, no sweaters. Nothing. Consequently, when we were going to my Grandma Compan's calling hours and funeral last week, we had a monumental problem on our hands.

For the calling hours, Andrew and Brendan immediately obliged us and dressed up before we left; Evan, however, did not. So, we took his clothes in the car. When we arrived, he screamed and cried, so I got out of the car with the older boys and left Chris to fend for himself with Evan in the van. His mission: get him dressed appropriately.

20 minutes later I am in the funeral home, and Chris is still in the van, trying to be reasonable with Evan about why he should wear his sweater. I trudge out to the van and eventually persuade him to merely put his dress clothes over the clothes he was wearing. That was a compromise he could live with.

He looked hilarious! His khaki pants looked like those Spiderman costumes with the fake muscles, except for the muscles were on his legs.

As soon as we got back to Tim's that night, Ev shed his layer of clothes. Here he is with his double pants.

In this next picture, Evan points to the shirt he has already disregarded the moment he walked in the door.

The next day of the funeral was worse. I had thought that if I adhered to my parenting rules that Evan would surely understand that mom and dad were not going to give in to him.

Apparently, Ev has his own rule book.

He cried, screamed, ripped off the good clothes for over two hours. Chris and Evan missed the whole funeral and burial while sitting in the car locked in a stalemate. Ultimately, we compromised with doubled up clothes again, but not before overwhelming frustration surfaced.

What have I learned?
1. The rules don't apply for each kid. All we can do is do our best.
2. Khakis are more flexible than I thought.
3. Kids teach parents much more than we ever teach them.
4. I need a new rule book.